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"I used to stand between your screenplay and a sale. Now I'm on your side." – DMA, former story analyst |
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The Nine Essential Elements of a Sellable Screenplay |
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DMA/Donna Michelle Anderson. |
Published by Movie in a Box Books
First Printing, May 2006
The 1-3-5 Story Structure Made Simple System
Copyright © 2006 by Donna Michelle Anderson
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews specifically addressing this publication.
ISBN-13: 978-0-9787150-0-7
ISBN-10: 0-9787150-0-4
Printed in The United States of America
Movie in a Box Books can be purchased for personal, business and educational use or sales promotion. They are available at quantity discounts.
For
information, please contact Movie in a Box, 14622 Ventura Blvd #333, Sherman
Oaks, CA 91403 or visit www.movieinabox.com.
Just because someone can have a baby
doesn't make them a good parent.
And just because someone can type…
doesn't make them a good writer.
Yeah, I said it.
–DMA
CONTENTS |
INTRODUCTION
Who needs to read this book?...1
CHAPTER 1
Why don't scripts get sold?...3
CHAPTER 2
What is the process of selling a script?...5
CHAPTER 3
Where do I begin?...9
CHAPTER 4
The "1" – THEME...13
CHAPTER 5
The "3" – CHARACTER ARC...17
CHAPTER 6
The "5" – BASIC SPINE...25
CHAPTER 7
The Anatomy of a Script...45
CHAPTER 8
The "1-3-5" Writing Process...49
CHAPTER 9
The Danger Zones...67
CHAPTER 10
The Sale...71
CHAPTER 11
The Final Word...73
APPENDIX A
The "1-3-5" Dictionary...75
APPENDIX B
Sample Coverage...81
This book is not for people who want to write screenplays. It is for people who intend to sell them.
This is not a guide to writing a "perfect script." That's because your script does not need to be "perfect" in order for you to sell it. It does need to include a simple set of industry-standard elements. This book is your guide to those basic elements your screenplay must contain in order for it to sell.
If you are reading The 1-3-5, you probably are one of two groups of people:
1) You have a great idea for a new script you want to sell; or
2) You have a completed script you need to fix before it is strong enough to sell.
The 1-3-5 is a critical "first-timers" manual. Not as in the first time you ever write a script, but as in the first time you submit any script for a potential sale (even for you veteran screenwriters!). You can bend the rules to some degree on scripts you submit to a company after that introductory sale. But a powerful first impression – and the ability to return to a company with future submissions – relies roughly 100% on your ability to prove you understand the basic rules of the game.
I also know that once you learn these rules of story structure, you'll be less tempted to want to break them. They've helped create a lot of memorable movies…including, most likely, your own personal top ten list. When I first developed "The 1-3-5 Story Structure Made Simple System" several years ago, it helped me more speedily and successfully analyze dozens of properties for one of the most powerful production companies in Hollywood. It also helped me easily write nine screenplays myself, including one commission that required me to read two of a bestselling author's novels and adapt them into a screenplay for an Oscar-winning actress in exactly seven days!
I cannot guarantee you will sell your script if you follow these simple rules to a "T." But I can pretty much guarantee you won't if you don't.
Three key requests before we move forward:
1) Decide now to respect the hard work of the people you are hoping to sell a script to. If you say all movies are crap, that means their movies are crap. If you say you don't have to follow the rules…you are saying they are idiots and sheep to follow the rules. You are talking or writing yourself out of a sale.
You wouldn't expect to perform open heart surgery at a hospital – and be highly paid for it – if you never bothered to get the education and training necessary to be a doctor! So don't expect to sell a screenplay to an established studio or production company without first dedicating yourself to learning the rules of screenwriting.
2) Accept right now that great screenwriting is a craft. That if you give the industry's system a try…you might actually write a better script. And sell it.
3) Fire up that VCR, DVR or DVD player! You will actually have to watch a lot of great movies before you successfully write one. It's like getting to see a photo of a ten-tiered wedding cake before you try to bake it. Great films show you where you're trying to go. And being familiar enough to discuss them…is another expected sign of respect for the industry I hope you're about to become a paid member of.
Thank you for entrusting your journey to me. Let's go.
Scripts don't get sold because the screenwriter didn't know, understand or respect the process of selling a script.
Selling a script works like this: a screenplay is submitted to a buyer, usually a production company, financier or a studio, to be read, evaluated and either bought or declined.
But who's doing the reading and evaluating that determines the sale? It's not the big wig you or your rep just played golf or did lunch with. It's his or her story analyst. And what the story analyst is looking for…is what ultimately will get your script sold.
I am a former "story analyst." The truth is, you may never have heard of my job, even if I use its less glorified title: "script reader." As an analyst or reader, I was the person, the gatekeeper, who read all of the screenplays that you, your agent, your lawyer, your cousin or your pool guy wanted my bosses to buy and make into hit movies. You see, my bosses were Very Big creative executives (CEs) at Very Big production companies. The pecking order went that I had to read about twenty screenplays a weekend so that the next week, they'd only have to read one or two: the one or two scripts that made it past me.
That's not to say I read twenty scripts, handed the two future blockbusters over to my bosses on Monday and made coasters out of the other eighteen God-awful messes. No, I read twenty scripts and "generated coverage" on all twenty of them. "Coverage" is another term you may or may not know, but chances are you truly don't realize the power of those five deadly pages. Every time I read a screenplay, I created a "coverage" document that:
1) rated the script in five key areas on the top sheet;
2) summarized the story on page two; and
3) analyzed its structure and content on pages three to five.
Coverage is what all the CEs at all the Very Bigs rely on to understand and discuss your script inside the company or beyond. And do you know what's at the bottom of the first page of that five-page kiss of death called coverage? One circled word: "Pass," "Consider" or "Recommend."
In two years of reading scripts and novels, I delivered fewer than ten "Considers" and five "Recommends." And my job was on the line if my CE committed time to reading any of those projects and disagreed. That's in case you're wondering why your "it's as good as it's gonna get" screenplay never made it past my desk.
The screenplays I read and their recommendations were entered into a company database to track a project's status. But my coverage also helped fill another, secret database. Keep reading – this is good.
At the bottom of any coverage top sheet, there actually are two sets of recommendations. The first one is for your script. The second one…is for you.
That's right, story analysts also have to evaluate the screenwriter in terms of "Pass", "Consider" or "Recommend." Your first script submission enters you permanently into a company's database. So you have two options. One, respect structure and write a solid script that at least gets a "Consider" for you, if not your screenplay. Or two, submit whatever you feel like because you're so excited, accept the "Pass" and wait for the company's database to crash so you can submit another project to them in the future.
You only have one chance to make a first impression before you are forever in a production company's database. And as much as a sale would change your life (for at least a year), what will at least open doors for you at Very Big is a "Recommend" in the writer's database. Now I want, in fact every reader wants, you and your script to be a "Recommend/Recommend." But this book is about you and what you want. So…
If you're okay being a "Pass," you should continue to write first drafts without outlining or doing a treatment first, rely on your best friend or mom to give you supportive feedback, ignore any employed industry insider who gently suggests re-working a single word or character and send it off to the biggest name you can get access to with a big silly logo on the top sheet, the infamous brad in the middle hole and a director I've never heard of (and no major studio would ever greenlight) attached inextricably to the project.
If you're shooting for a "Consider," thank you in advance for thinking through some of your story structure before typing "FADE IN:", using standard software for a professional look, caring enough about your characters to give them distinct traits, having two hot actors interested in the project, still relying a bit too often on convention or cliché to tell your familiar story but setting it in a fresh environment, with some occasionally LOL dialogue and a surprise twist at the end.
If you'll settle for nothing less than a "Recommend," read on and commit to The "1-3-5."
A bonus for everyone: sample coverage is in the back of this book. You will pretty much never get to see your own coverage from a company. So enjoy this sneak peek to get an idea of what you're up against…and see why you need The "1-3-5."
Let me first tell you where you should please NOT begin.
Don't begin by typing "Fade In:" on page one of a new script.
Don't begin by meeting with Mega Star's Senior Vice President of Production to pitch a vague, structureless, themeless idea (unless you are Mega Star's pool guy).
The first step of your screenplay actually is a single kernel of inspiration inside of you. It's an emotion or an issue or character or single scene that you can't get out of your head or your heart. And the need to capture and share that inspiration is what will drive you to script one hundred-plus passionate pages of action and dialogue. It is what I call your "motivating moment."
So what do you do with that single, motivating moment? Write it down on an index card and tape it to your mirror or your computer (or your liquor cabinet), wherever you know you'll see it first thing every morning.
From that index card, here are the minimum steps you are going to take to create a sellable screenplay, in this order:
1) The 1: THEME – Narrow down a thematic issue you care enough to commit to (it probably underlies that "motivating moment").
2) The 3: CHARACTER ARC – Define the beginning, middle and end of your Main Character's arc in relation to that theme.
3) The 5: BASIC SPINE
– Craft the five basic stages that form the foundation of your Main Character's
journey along that arc. (Chances are your "motivating moment" is the basis of
one of these five elements.)
To make it simple, story structure is based on a clear and relatable theme, a focused character arc and a story spine that forms the foundation of your Main Character's journey.
But you don't believe in structure! You spit on "formula" movies and intend to write an "original" script at last! Never mind that you saw The Fast and the Furious eight times or still cry every time you see Pretty Woman. Story structure – peh!
Too bad for you. If you just want to be a screenwriter, go type away (and independently produce away…and pay to screen your film at a local theater…). But if you want to be a screenseller, there are important rules to follow in that first submission. So please let me present the role of story structure to you in a new and easy way.
If I ask you to throw the ideal dinner party, all expenses paid, you could whip up a killer menu in five minutes. You would rattle off your appetizer, your soup or salad, your entrée and your dessert. It might be chips and dip, then a cup of chili, hot dogs and fries and chocolate cake for dessert. Or it might be foie gras with toast points, tomato bisque, and salmon en croûte with haricots verts, finished up with fresh sorbet. But whatever you're cooking, I know you're going to serve it to me in a certain order.
In fact, if you came to my house, and I served you a steak, then some chowder, then an ice cream sundae then some bean dip with tortilla chips, you probably wouldn't want to eat it (even if I was Mega Star's pool guy). In fact, you'd probably say I don't know how to throw a dinner party. In fact, odds are you'd probably never give me the chance to make you dinner again.
Get it? Story structure doesn't tell you what to create. It just tells you the way in which your audience expects to receive your brilliant creativity. And The "1-3-5" is the simplest approach to understanding and applying story structure.
If you commit to The "1-3-5," if you are ruthless about its elements being sound and original and exciting, and you or your writer translate them faithfully into your screenplay, you are ahead of 99.7% of the scripts in the pile your reader brought home. You are that much closer than they are to a "Recommend."
But wait! How do you translate structure faithfully into your screenplay? Slow down. Let's learn The "1-3-5" first. The rest of the writing process will come later – and much easier, thanks to The "1-3-5."
THE ROAD TO "RECOMMEND"
Throughout this book, you will find a series of pledges that summarize what you have learned so far – and what you must commit to do in order to have a sellable script. Ready for the first one?
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Pledge #1: I will strictly apply the rules of The "1-3-5" to my screenplay before submitting it to anyone for any reason, regardless of how hard I must work to write or rewrite my script. |
The "1" is the theme of your screenplay. Identifying and committing to this is the first step in crafting solid story structure for your script.
Theme is the first thing I, as a story analyst, am going to check out to see if I need to carefully read your screenplay. How? I'm going to flip through pages 8-13 of the script and see what the main character is obsessing over. Then I'm going to flip to the last ten pages of the script and see what the main character is learning about. These had better be the same issue.
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To make it simple, the theme of your screenplay is the single issue your main character struggles to learn a lesson about in your movie.
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What do I mean by issue? I mean a "value" or "institution." You know what values are! Values are things like: love, happiness, security, honesty, wealth, commitment, growth, power, etc. Institutions? Easy! Institutions are social structures like: marriage, parenthood, employment, etc.
IMPORTANT: You only get to choose one issue for your entire screenplay. That's right, one.
If your screenplay begins with the main character battling an issue relating to wealth…continues with the main character working through fear…and ends with the main character understanding the true meaning of love… your audience and your story analyst are going to utter the hateful phrase "I don't know what that movie was about." Peh!
That's because that movie wasn't about anything. It was about three things: wealth, fear and love. But it can only be about one: The "1" – your theme.
How do you know if you have a theme?
When you describe your movie, you can state in one or two sentences, called a "statement of theme," what shift your main character makes in relation to a single issue.
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REAL SCREEN REINFORCEMENT |
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Here are sample theme statements of hit movies that stuck to their central issue (think you know which films they are? Check the answers below!):
a) dry ice; b) FATHERHOOD; or c) the 49ers?
a) Sporty Spice; b) "Carpe diem"; or c) INTIMACY?
What's the theme?
a) PRIDE; b) no, it's not "b"; or c) seriously, it's "a"?
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But how do you identify the theme in your screenplay? There's actually a great way to cheat this . The "1" is an integral part of The "3," which is coming up next. But first, a quick theme-spotting exercise:
NOTE: Throughout this book, there'll be action tips for two different levels of progress: people just starting a script ("Clean Slate"); and people fixing a finished screenplay ("Fix-It Mode").
Creating/Identifying The "1" – Theme
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"CLEAN SLATE" To identify your theme, always start with your "motivating moment." What is the value or institution at the center of that scene or statement or choice? Chances are, that's what your screenplay will be about.
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"FIX-IT" MODE To identify your theme, re-read your script and highlight every key choice your character makes. What is the value or institution at the center of those choices? If it's many values, you don't have a theme yet – which you probably don't, or your script would not feel broken! Identify the value in the script's most powerful moment…can you rework the script to make this issue the focus of the main character's journey? |
One more recommendation before you move on to The "3." Assemble a "Research Lab" of at least three of your favorite movies right now. Make sure there's a mix – like a comedy, a drama and a kid's flick. Skim through the films to remember the main character's key choices. Can you identify in one word the issue that drives their choices throughout the film?
If you can't do that with your favorite movies, stock your Lab with these structural triumphs: Kramer vs. Kramer, Pretty Woman and Big. Happy Theme Hunting!
THE ROAD TO "RECOMMEND"
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Pledge #2: I will commit to a single issue, or theme, for my main character to confront. All of his or her choices will revolve around that theme. If I just can't figure out how to identify my theme, I will in the next step, thanks to The "3." |
The "3" is the character arc that defines your main character's internal change over the course of the screenplay. It is the second thing you must work out before beginning to write a script. It can also help you if you are stuck trying to nail down the theme for The "1"!
As a story analyst, I also have a shortcut to confirm your character's arc. What is it? I'm going to check pages 8-13 to see what thing your character rejects…then I'm going to check the middle of the script to see if they embrace it…then I'm going to check the last ten pages of the script to see if they sacrifice it. If not, you are a "Pass."
To make it simple, the character arc in your screenplay is how your main character changes in relation to a single issue, ultimately learning an important life lesson.
Here's what's so hot about character arc: audiences don't go to the same movie over and over again because of what the characters do on the outside…but because of how the characters change on the inside. They learn to love! They learn to walk away from pain! They learn to finally believe in themselves! In short…they "learn" something – something the audience connects personally to learning.
This means you cannot make your character fabulous and likable in the beginning of the script, or there's no room for them to grow and change. Your goal isn't to create a pleasant character…it's to create a relatable one.
If the main character does not change and ultimately learn something in your script, your audience and story analyst will utter the hated phrase: "Nothing happened in that movie." Then your story analyst will type: "Pass."
We're all on-board the Change Train, yes? Now comes the easy part. Your character has to change in a pre-defined way. There are three parts to the character arc in a hit American movie. That is why I call the character arc, well, The "3."
Here is precisely how your main character must change over the course of your script:
The 3 – CHARACTER ARC
Got it? Reject…embrace…sacrifice. That is classic, blockbuster, "Recommend"-worthy character arc.
Here is The "3" again in statement form. Still simple!
(Rejection Statement)
(Embracing Statement)
(Sacrificing Statement)
Get the pattern? Now for the cool trick.
What is the "blank" that follows each step of The "3"? It is a single word. And to get a "Recommend"…all three of those blanks had better be the same word. For example:
And what do you think "fatherhood" is? (drum roll)
It is the theme of your screenplay. Would you just go buy Kramer vs. Kramer already?
Let me say that again. Your main character must arc in relation to one and only one issue. And that issue is the theme of your screenplay. I told you earlier there was a way to cheat and find your theme!
There's another term for the stages of the character arc. Rejection, Embrace and Sacrifice are also considered the Beginning, Middle and End of your main character's journey.
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REAL SCREEN REINFORCEMENT |
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Here are sample character arcs from popular movies:
What "classic" film do you still watch every Sunday and cry every time at the end of?
(a) The Parent Trap (b) Big or (c) Pee Wee's Big Adventure?
Yes, "b." And isn't being "Big" just a kid's word for being an adult? Would you just go buy "Big" already?
What love-to-hate it popular film is it?
(a) Maid in Manhattan (b) Monster-in-Law (c) The Wedding Planner or (d) fill in any other Jennifer Lopez flick here? (Say, J-Lo seems to connect to a certain issue in her scripts…)
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Can you see that by respecting the rule of The "3," you are giving critical focus to your script, but you are not confined to any specific characters, setting, actions, relationships, dialogue or other creative elements in your screenplay?
The truly magical thing about The "3" is that each part of your character's arc has to relate precisely to the other two parts. That makes screenwriting simple! If you know one element of the character arc, you automatically know the other two.
For instance, if your bride is going to reluctantly walk away from the wedding altar and a bad marriage at the end of the movie, that means the theme for your story might be "commitment." Let's drop "commitment" into the Character Arc machine:
Your theme must be one and only one issue. So you know now that your character has to reject commitment at the top of the script and wholly embrace commitment in the middle. Now you've got a basis for your story.
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PITFALL ALERT!!! The number one mistake that costs screenplays even a "Consider" is in the third stage of the character arc. One character rejects then embraces the theme…but a completely different character makes the sacrifice at the end. It has to be the same character, the main character, who arcs throughout the movie!
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If different characters populate each stage of The "3" (Reject/Embrace/Sacrifice), your story analyst and audience will utter the hated words, "Whose movie is this?" We'll discuss that other first-submission deathtrap, multiple main characters, later in the book.
The Reverse Arc
By now, you are thinking "All the movies I've seen don't follow this formula!" You are in an angry place. Wah!
First, no, not all movies follow this character arc. That doesn't mean the screenplays they were based on, the ones that got sold, did not. Who knows what the studio, stars, director and pool guy changed after the green light?
Second, no, not all movies follow this character arc. But are these movies you love and watch over and over again? Or are these movies you enjoyed despite feeling there was something missing? Or are these movies you hated and couldn't believe got made (see the "first" point again)?
Third, not all movies follow this character arc. Some employ the "reverse arc" instead. It is nowhere near as effective, but at least it's an arc. Watch this:
The 3 – REVERSE CHARACTER ARC
Here it is in simple statements, like before.
(Embracing Statement)
(Rejection Statement)
(Accepting Statement)
Here's an example:
Can you see how reluctant acceptance of one's fate feels less powerful at the end of a movie than heroic self-sacrifice? Great! For any remaining skeptics: yes, of course there are hit films that successfully use the reverse arc, including the spectacular modern classic When Harry Met Sally. But know this: that script had brilliant dialogue (and Meg Ryan's diner orgasm), was original as an issue film (men and women being platonic friends), and, most importantly, was not Nora Ephron's first submission (she was already Oscar®-nominated for Silkwood). For your first submission, because it's a softer ending, the reverse arc is really only "Consider"-worthy, and that's with all other elements of structure soundly in place. Only the standard character arc is a giant leap down the road to "Recommend."
Why? Because Hollywood audiences love generosity and sacrifice. Your character is only as good as what s/he gives up to learn and grow and make the world a better place. Frontier, shmontier – we're softies at heart.
Make sure your character sacrifices something big at the end of your movie and completes his or her arc. The "5" will tell you how.
Creating/Identifying The "3" – Character Arc
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"CLEAN SLATE"
To create your character arc, check your motivating moment to see if it clearly is a rejection, embracing or sacrifice of a relatable issue. If not, brainstorm one of these three moments for your story and see what theme your character is confronting. Then drop that moment and theme into the Character Arc machine and fill in the other two stages with the same theme.
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"FIX-IT" MODE
To test your character arc, check the rejection your main character makes when faced with the initial unexpected change in your story. What's the value/institution being rejected? Now flip to halfway through the screenplay. Is the main character now embracing that same issue? Now go to the end of the script. Is the main character now sacrificing in relation to that same issue? If not, rework these scenes until all 3 line up with the same theme!
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One more recommendation before you go on to The "5." Screen the beginning, middle and end of your Research Lab flicks right now for the three stages of character arc. Here's a tip – in many pop flicks, the second stage, the "embracing" of the issue, is either an upbeat montage or an intense silent scene with the hottest cut from the soundtrack!
THE ROAD TO "RECOMMEND"
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Pledge #3: My main character and only my main character will arc from rejecting to embracing to sacrificing in relation to my script's single theme over the course of the screenplay (more on multiple main characters later!). |
The "5" is the basic spine, or foundation, of your story. These are the five necessary elements that establish the different landmark stages of your main character's journey.
When I'm analyzing your script, I'm going to tick off each of the five elements of the spine as they occur. If even one of them is missing, you and your script are both a "Pass."
The "3" was about how your main character changes on the inside. The "5" is what your main character does on the outside that makes that change happen.
The five elements of your script's basic spine are:
These truly are like the five courses of a dinner, and your audience expects them to unfold in this order (unless you're Tarantino, and he only got away with that once, back in ‘94).
To make it simple, the basic spine is the five stages of your character's journey that are necessary to tell the story.
Let's open by debunking a big myth. The classic Hollywood tale is not "boy-meets-girl, boy-loses-girl, boy-wins-girl-back"! Those are only three of the five elements necessary to tell a classic Hollywood tale. As you proceed, see if you can figure out which stage of The "5" each one is.
The 5 – BASIC SPINE
#1: The "Set-Up"
The "Set-Up" opens your screenplay. It is not the time to introduce every character in the script and show all of your different settings and relationships. Quite the opposite! You want to make it as short as possible.
The Set-Up establishes the normal existence and expectations of your Main Character. But not every minute and action and person in every typical day! Just the specific values and relationships necessary to give meaning to the upcoming Unexpected Change.
A Bond movie has an explosion, a car chase, a cool gadget, a discarded sexy woman and an ingenious escape in every Set-Up. That's all we need to know about Bond to make his new assignment seem like the hardest one ever.
In Kramer vs. Kramer, we see a rising ad exec schmoozing his boss into the evening while his weeping wife anxiously packs. By the time he saunters home late, expecting dinner and praise for bringing home the bacon, we understand what he cares about (his career) and what he doesn't (his family). It takes approximately three minutes.
The Set-Up is the last part of the "5" you will finalize. Jot down notes of all of the information you think is important for your audience and story analyst to understand the Unexpected Change…then move on. You will be able to whittle down the Set-Up more effectively when you've gotten through the rest of the story.
You have ten pages (which translate to ten minutes on screen) to set up your story. Shoot for five. Any longer than that, and your audience and story analyst will utter the hated words, "When is this movie going to start?" They are waiting for the Unexpected Change!
The 5 – BASIC SPINE
#2: The "Unexpected Change"
The "Unexpected Change" is the single most important element of story structure. Forget page one of your script; the Unexpected Change is the official beginning of your film.
There are endless names for the Unexpected Change you may already be familiar with: the Call, the Inciting Incident, the Monkey Wrench. All fantastic! I like to keep things simple. So I call it the Unexpected Change.
Once the Set-Up has established the daily existence and expectations of your main character, it is time for the Unexpected Change. The Unexpected Change is the single event near the top of the script that upsets your Main Character's normal life and launches his or her journey.
Here are examples from movies that aren't all structurally perfect – but the Unexpected Change sure works!
· Unexpected Change: In The Truman Show, a light falls out of the sky and clocks Jim Carrey in the head.
· Unexpected Change: In Big, Tom Hanks wakes up in the body of a grown man.
· Unexpected Change: In My Best Friend's Wedding, Julia Roberts' lovesick best male friend calls to announce he's about to marry someone else.
The audience understands the potential impact of these Unexpected Changes because of the information provided in the Set-Up.
· Set-Up: In The Truman Show, we know Jim Carrey is a happy-go-lucky family guy living in a perfect universe. Then comes the Unexpected Change: Ow! Did a light just fall out of the sky onto my head?
· Set-Up: In Big, we know Tom Hanks is a self-conscious pre-teen who has no freedom at home and is too little to impress the cutest girl in school. Then comes the Unexpected Change: Hey, is that stubble on my face?
· Set-Up: In My Best Friend's Wedding, we know Julia Roberts is a high-powered woman who takes her besotted best male friend thoroughly for granted. Then comes the Unexpected Change: Excuse me, you're marrying someone else?
The Unexpected Change does two key things. It launches your character's journey. And it introduces the audience to your main character's Main Opponent in the movie. The Main Opponent who is whoever or whatever caused the Unexpected Change. Take note of that – we'll be back to visit our Main Opponent again!
Now how do you decide what the Unexpected Change should be? It's time for the next neat trick.
Take a moment to consider human nature. How do you and every other red-blooded person you know respond to change? Do you immediately run smiling towards it through a field of lilies, arms wide open? Or do you…at first…say it with me now…REJECT it?
Does that word sound familiar?
The Unexpected Change immediately launches the first part of your main character's arc: "I REJECT ."
So how do you decide what event will be the Change in your script? You already know what issue your main character has to reject. Your job now is to create an original way to introduce that into their world…so s/he can reject it.
If you know your main character needs to reject commitment, you might set up a big wedding and have your bride run out on the groom (Runaway Bride). Or you could have a bed-hopping cad meet his dream girl…but introduce himself with his "fake name" (50 First Dates). It's up to your imagination! And your character's values. And the setting. And the realities of the time period.
Be creative as you dream up ways to upset your main character's routine little apple cart! Just make sure your theme is the issue at stake.
Let's see how your spine looks with this second step:
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THE "5" – BASIC SPINE
· The Rejection |
Think of it this way. It is human nature, when faced with changes to normal expectations, to immediately take steps to restore life to the way it was before the Unexpected Change. Is it any wonder that is also how classic story structure operates?
But life already has taught you that running away from change never resolves it. In fact, ignoring change usually makes things worse. It causes even bigger problems. That is the chain reaction that your main character unleashes by Rejecting the Unexpected Change. Whatever step s/he makes to make life like it was must trigger a slightly bigger counter response. And that dance will continue for about fifteen more pages/minutes, at which point your main character finally accepts that the change is not going to go away…and commits to just trying to muddle through life with the Unexpected Change.
That shining moment is called "the Commitment."
In Kramer vs. Kramer (yep, here we go again…), Kramer gets a letter from his missing wife…and discovers she really isn't coming back. He spends a quiet scene finally removing her presence from the apartment, tossing her toothbrush, taking down her pictures, committing to being a single father.
So now your spine is looking like this:
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THE "5" – BASIC SPINE
· The Rejection · The Commitment |
The 5 – BASIC SPINE
#3: The "Reversal"
Once your main character stops fighting the Unexpected Change and commits to it, little things begin to happen that make the Unexpected Change seem not so bad after all! "Hey, this fatherhood thing's a bit tricky, but wow, what fun we had eating donuts for breakfast the other day!" Just as in life, little moments of positive feedback push your main character to invest more deeply in this new life of Change. So even better things happen. And before you know it, your main character has…say it with me…EMBRACED the Change!
What? Did you say "Embrace"? As in "I do want?" Yep. It's time for the second part of your main character's arc! The Reversal is the halfway point of your script when your Main Character fully embraces the Unexpected Change for purely self-serving reasons.
So now your spine is fleshing out to look like this:
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THE "5" – BASIC SPINE
· The Rejection · The Commitment
· The Embrace |
Again, it's a favorite industry ploy to shoot a high-energy, good-time, fun-loving montage to represent the Reversal, ending with an intense emotional scene, without much dialogue, to show the Embrace. Either way, this is where your hot song adds the final sizzle and sells the audience on your main character's new love for the Change.
· Reversal: Kevin Bacon teaches the gloriously oafish Chris Penn how to dance in the central montage of Footloose.
· Reversal: Richard Gere endures relentless physical training in a rainstorm and proves even his spittle is sexy when he confronts Lou Gossett, Jr. in order to stay in Officer Candidate School in An Officer and a Gentleman.
PITFALL ALERT!!! Many screenwriters end their story at the Reversal. If your main character only makes it from "I don't want" to "I do want" in one-hundred plus pages…that's a big ole "Pass." You must complete the character arc with a Sacrifice!
Congratulations – you've sketched out the first half of your spine! But where on earth do you go after this Reversal Embracing love fest? Don't worry. This is where everyone gets stuck in their screenplay – the second half.
How exactly do you get from the Embrace to the end of your story? By remembering the mission: your main character is here to learn something via personal sacrifice.
Understand this – right now, your character loves the Unexpected Change because it's making his or her own life better. It's all me-me-me! So it's time to kick a little main character butt.
Immediately after the Reversal, you must shock your main character with a serious obstacle. What's the obstacle? It is always the main opponent, who caused the Unexpected Change, in a newly empowered version.
It can't be that simple. Yes, it is. And wait, your job gets even easier!
The entire second half of your script will be an increasingly focused and escalating duel between your main character and the main opponent.
· In the second half of The Truman Show, Jim Carrey tries to uncover the mystery of his bubble world and is thwarted by the production company who mounted the light that initially dropped on his head.
· In the second half of Big, Tom Hanks is in a race against time to track down Zoltar, the carnival machine that initially turned him into a grown-up.
· In the second half of My Best Friend's Wedding, Julia Roberts squares off in an escalating battle against Cameron Diaz who initially "took" Dermot Mulroney by becoming his fiancée.
Oh, what the heck, let's keep going!
· In the second half of Jaws, Roy Scheider and company head out to open water to kill the shark that initially ate the skinny dipper.
· In the second half of Kramer vs. Kramer, Dustin Hoffman fights for custody of his son against Meryl Streep after she'd initially left him to raise their child alone.
· In the second half of fill in the name of your favorite sci-fi flick here, bold young man/hot young chick leaves his or her world to fight on the intergalactic home planet of the bad guy who initially caused the Unexpected Change.
The first half of your script pits your main character mainly against self and obstacles in the world s/he knows. In the second half, your main character must now battle the newly powerful main opponent, hopefully on new and unfamiliar territory. Ideally, in fact, this battle happens on the home turf of the main opponent!
Yes, secondary plotlines will develop in the second half of the script, but they must serve the central battle, too. In Pretty Woman, Richard Gere's increasingly hostile takeover battle with a father figure triggers jealous reactions from his lawyer that nearly cost Gere the love of his life.
One tip: don't let your main character actually see the main opponent immediately after the Reversal. Let the audience know they're out there and badder than ever, but briefly build to that first face-to-face reunion.
I know you are saying right now…hey, wait a minute. The bad guy is in almost every scene of the movie in a lot of films. Heck, it felt like Jane Fonda had more screen time in "Monster-in-Law" than Jennifer Lopez. And I am asking right now…is "Monster-in-Law" on your top ten list? (No offense to the fabulous Ms. Fonda!)
Listen to me: if your main opponent is in every scene of the movie, you are relying too heavily on one source of conflict. You are not going to get a "Recommend." (If you're still confused about how bad movies get made, please re-read page 21.)
One more thing: remember, the main opponent is not always a "bad" person or thing. The main opponent may love your main character to pieces – but if that love gets in the way of your main character's mission, then you've got yourself an opponent.
Get it? Okay, so now your spine is looking like this:
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THE "5" – BASIC SPINE
· The Rejection · The Commitment
· The Embrace · The Return of the Main Opponent · The Escalation |
All right, let's bring this baby home.
The 5 – BASIC SPINE
#4: The "Final Battle"
You did it. You pushed your main character off the cliff of change and s/he has sped through hanging branches and bounced off of rocks and is speeding with all the force of gravity towards the ground that is the end of your movie.
Is that how your screenplay feels? Please?
Now it's time for your main character to face the main opponent at its greatest power in a Final Battle. Remember, your main opponent is whoever or whatever caused the Unexpected Change at the top of the script.
The Final Battle is the moment when your Main Character physically faces the Main Opponent and fights for his or her biggest need, on behalf of self and a greater cause.
Entering the Final Battle, what your main character – and the main character's world – stands to lose is the biggest possible loss of the whole journey. In fact, your main character now should be fighting for more than self-preservation; there must be other people, possibly whole planets at stake!
So how do you create the most tension, the highest stakes and the most impact in a battle between two entities? You put them in the ring together. So this is key: the Final Battle must be an extended face-to-face confrontation between your main character and the main opponent.
In The Empire Strikes Back, Luke doesn't call Darth Vader on a flip phone and talk trash to him about the dark side of the Force. He whips out his light saber and confronts his enemy face-to-face and all alone, high on a freezing cold platform in Vader's own city.
A quick note: the Final Battle also is the right time for what we all know as "the twist." The twist is an additional revelation, a surprise ambush called a "reveal," that increases the power that your main opponent has over your main character during the Final Battle. For instance, this is good time to let Luke know you're his father!
Twist or no twist, near the end of your Final Battle, your main character should appear to have hit "rock bottom" in the fight and in the overall journey itself.
Here are some great Final Battles:
· In Kramer vs. Kramer, Dustin Hoffman confronts his ex, Meryl Streep, in a vicious courtroom battle – where he learns that after having been an invisible stay-at-home mom, she now makes more money than he does (nice twist)! He loses custody of his son, and his attorney tells him he has to give up custody or put his son on the stand in a brutal appeal…
· In Big, Tom Hanks faces off against wish-granting machine "Zoltar the Magnificent" with a quarter in his hand and a high-strung girlfriend and politically rocky job on his mind. He drops in his quarter, and Zoltar commands him to "Make a Wish" – if he's really ready to be little again…
Are you seeing a pattern, here?
In the last moment of the Final Battle, your main character must be faced with a Final Choice. Good news – this is simple, too!
To determine your Final Choice, just give your main character exactly what s/he wanted in the Rejection statement…in an exaggerated form.
In other words, the Final Choice always forces your main character to choose the theme of your movie…or not. Guess which one they are going to choose?
The Final Choice is your cue as a screenwriter to make your main character face giving up a selfish dream to complete personal growth and make the world a better place. Hmm…smells like…a Sacrifice.
That's right! The Final Battle ends in a Final Choice that leads, of course, to the third part of your character arc: the Sacrifice.
The Sacrifice must be the next decision made after your main character is faced with the Final Choice. It is the moment of selflessness that proves the lesson has been learned. It is so important to your audience, your movie will be incomplete without it. You certainly cannot sell a script without it.
But he is a real father now, and he's learned to put his child first. He can't put his innocent child on the stand to face that brutality. So he sacrifices.
Sacrifice: The next time we see Kramer, he is walking with his son, explaining how great life will be living with Mommy.
But he is a real man now, and he's learned that childhood still has a lot to teach him before he's ready to be a true adult. So he sacrifices.
Sacrifice: The next time we see Josh, he's wishing he was small and facing a crushed Elizabeth Perkins in the empty fairgrounds.
Now let's fill in your basic spine with the most important part of your story, the Final Battle:
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THE "5" – BASIC SPINE
· The Rejection · The Commitment
· The Embrace · The Return of the Main Opponent · The Escalation
· The Twist (optional) · Rock Bottom · The Final Choice · The Sacrifice |
The Final Battle through the Sacrifice has a common term in writing: it's called the "climax" of your movie.
How huge is the Climax? Think of it this way. When people ask, "How does the movie end?"…they aren't talking about the final soothing, wrap-it-all-up minutes of the film. They are talking about the Climax, the ultimate test of your main character's commitment to the journey, sealed with the ultimate sacrifice. And if it doesn't happen face-to-face against the original cause of the Unexpected Change…and your main character doesn't make a selfless sacrifice….your audience and your story analyst will utter the hateful words: "That movie didn't really end."
I smell a "Pass."
Missing an element of the Final Battle is an unforgivable omission in a script – and the kiss of death in the theater.
Now, here's my favorite "secret
weapon" use for the Final Battle. If you are writing a biographical script,
look first for that person's greatest moment of sacrifice in life. That will instantly
establish the end of the story and your theme. Once you plug that Sacrifice
and Theme into your Character Arc "machine," you can review earlier choices in
the person's life that fit the Rejection and the Embrace stages. Fill those
in, and you have the timeline of your story!
The 5 – BASIC SPINE
#5: The "Reward"
You're bracing yourself now. This is the part you will fight the most: the idiotic, mandatory "Happy Ending" – peh!
Wrong! "Happy endings" aren't simple enough.
Your main character has just battled the biggest change of life, faced the biggest conflict of that battle and made a huge personal sacrifice to prove what s/he's learned along the way.
Your audience and your story analyst don't want a happy ending. They demand a just reward.
The Reward is what your Main Character deserves to get as a result of the Sacrifice s/he just made.
If you have been precisely following the rules of The "1-3-5," your main character has just made a selfless personal Sacrifice in a Final Choice, in order to become a better person and make the world a better place. So the Reward for that action pretty much has to be…a happy ending.
But hey, if the Final Choice is selfish, if your main character is Keanu Reeves in Devil's Advocate and his choice after the Final Battle is to take a bite out of the reporter's apple and go for glory…then the just reward for that pretty much has to be…that the reporter is really the devil…and Keanu is going to go through Hell with Al Pacino's Milton again.
So craft a just reward for your main character – and make it speedy! Don't get carried away with a bunch of dialogue, and never bring in new information or characters here unless they directly relate to the reward.
You have about five pages/minutes to pay off your main character's journey. Shoot for three.
Let's look at some very effective rewards:
Reward: The moment after that choice, Meryl Streep arrives, but instead of taking their son with her, she acknowledges that Dustin has become a great father…and lets him keep his son.
You are crying at this point, no matter how many times you see it, because that is a just reward for Dustin's loving choice.
Reward: The moment after that choice, he's being dropped off at his suburban home, shuffling along in his giant suit, his mother's agonized cry of "Josh?" greeting him at the door.
You are crying at this point, no matter how many times you see it, because those are just desserts for such a mature choice.
Your spine should now look like this:
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THE "5" – BASIC SPINE
· The Rejection · The Commitment
· The Embrace · The Return of the Main Opponent · The Escalation
· The Twist (optional) · Rock Bottom · The Final Choice · The Sacrifice
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Do you think now you can fit the three steps of "boy-meets-girl/boy-loses-girl/boy-wins-girl-back" into the "5"? Incorporate them into the sample spine above, and e-mail your guess to info@movieinabox.com. We'll send correct submissions a very useful link!
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REAL SCREEN REINFORCEMENT |
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Let's look at a completed sample spine:
Kramer vs. Kramer 1. The "Set-Up": Late at night, Kramer schmoozes his ad exec boss and is promised an important campaign. Meanwhile, his wife Joanna tearfully packs and says goodbye to their son. 2. The "Unexpected Change": When Kramer gets home, Joanna announces she's leaving him – and leaving their son Billy in his care. · The Rejection: "I don't want fatherhood." Kramer calls Joanna's best friend and tells her to send Joanna home then unpacks the suitcase he wrested away from her when she left. · The Commitment: Kramer finally stores away the last of Joanna's visible belongings. 3. The "Reversal": Kramer has managed to fit Billy into his busy lifestyle, and they've begun to bond. · The Embrace: "I do want fatherhood." Kramer teaches Billy to ride a bike, clapping and snapping proud photos. · The Return of the Main Opponent: When Kramer drops Billy off at school, Joanna is watching through the window of a nearby coffee shop. She's baaaaa-aaaaack. · The Escalation: Joanna sues Kramer for full custody of Billy. Billy has a playground accident, and Kramer gets fired for neglecting his job to do fatherly duties. 4. The "Final Battle": Kramer and Joanna face off in court. · The Twist: Kramer learns in the court battle that Joanna now earns more money than he does. He's toast. · Rock Bottom: Kramer loses full custody to Joanna. · The Final Choice: Kramer must give up Billy or try to win him back by dragging him into a vicious court appeal and pitting him against his mom. · The Sacrifice: "I give up fatherhood to make myself a better person and life better for my son and ex-wife." Kramer rejects his lawyer's appeal proposal and accepts the court order of maternal custody. 5. The "Reward": On the day Joanna is to come take Billy home, she instead says that Billy already is home with Kramer, his dad. She goes up to say goodbye. Kramer gets to keep his son. |
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Do you understand the journey of Kramer vs. Kramer without having read the whole script? Are you compelled simply by the spine of the story? Don't you kind of want to see the film now, if only to understand the structurally sound presence of JoBeth Williams' then-scandalous bare butt (you think you remember why, but at this point in the book, don't you kind of want to see her butt in an entirely new context)?
And do you now see what you need to do and know for your own story before you can begin to type (or re-type) "FADE IN:"?
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PITFALL ALERT!!! Some of you are dying to know how all of this "arc"ing and "spine"ing works if you have MULTIPLE MAIN CHARACTERS. Yeek. Don't try this at home, not on your first script or first submission!
If you must initially submit a script with more than one main character, remember these two things: 1) all of your main characters must fully arc (Reject/Embrace/Sacrifice). And 2) all of your main characters must arc distinctly in response to the same Unexpected Change and the same Final Battle.
NOTE: If only one character is Rejecting, Embracing and Sacrificing in your story, what you really have is one main character surrounded by an ensemble cast.
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That, then, is "The 1-3-5 Story Structure Made Simple System." You absolutely must know and utilize this to create or evaluate a strong, sellable first submission.
And if that screenplay precisely adheres to The "1-3-5" in an original way, with fresh dialogue and a stunning surprise twist at the end, well, that, my friend, is a "Recommend."
But wait – you're not ready to start writing the screenplay just yet!
I know you feel that after you turned yourself over to the simple process of story structure…you should have been justly rewarded. Instead, you still don't get to type "FADE IN:"!
Breathe. Now that you get The "1-3-5," it's time to learn the simplest process for implementing it most effectively. "The 1-3-5 Writing Process" is coming up next!
Creating/Identifying The "5" – Basic Spine
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"CLEAN SLATE"
To flesh out your story's spine, start with a blank basic spine (copy the one from this chapter, if you like). Fill in the theme in your character arc statements. Put in the motivating moment if it still compels you as a scene. Then brainstorm each of the stages of the spine, dreaming up scenes and choices, to build the story you most want to write.
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"FIX-IT" MODE
To double check your story's spine, start with a blank basic spine (copy the one from this chapter, if you like). Fill in the theme in your character arc statements. Then fill in the characters, actions and choices that represent each stage of the five. Now answer these questions: · Does the Set-Up give meaning to the Unexpected Change? · Is the Unexpected Change immediately followed by the Rejection? · Does the main character reluctantly Commit to the Change? · Does the Reversal lead to the Embrace of the Change? · Does the second half of the story escalate the war between the main character and the main opponent? · Does the Final Battle pit the main character in a face-to-face battle with the main opponent? · Does your main character hit "rock bottom" near the end of the Battle? · Does the Final Choice reflect the theme? · Does the main character make a Sacrifice in response to the Final Choice? · Does the main character get a just Reward for the Sacrifice? · Can you clearly state what the main character learned? · Are you satisfied at the end? Better yet, are you teary-eyed? |
Now back to the Research Lab! Watch each of your selected films only for the five parts of the basic spine. See how character arc ties into spine? If your favorite flick isn't working with The "1-3-5"…test it against the "Fix-It" Mode tips above. Could you have made it a better movie?
THE ROAD TO "RECOMMEND"
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Pledge #4: My basic spine will set up a flawed, relatable main character, expose them to a difficult Unexpected Change, shift them from rejecting to embracing that Change, jeopardize the Change by pitting them against the main opponent, force them to sacrifice the Change to grow and for the good of others, then justly reward them for that Sacrifice. |
Chapter |
7 |
The Anatomy of a Script |
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This information may be new for some and a timely refresher for others, but it is critical information for all. In order to create a professional screenplay – and be able to discuss it with people using the correct terms, you must understand the simplest building blocks of a script. Let's dissect one now:
Screenplays
You are trying to write or re-write a sellable SCREENPLAY. You have 120 pages. Shoot for 105-113. The first thing your story analyst is going to check is the page number on the last page of your script. Don't turn in 90-page scripts; they will know you have limited story. And truly don't turn in 200-page scripts unless you're Jim Cameron, and it's 1995. You are not…and it is not.
Acts
That screenplay you are writing/re-writing is made up of ACTS. Some say three acts, some say four acts. I say "forget the acts for now!" TiVo, broadband and mobile content are tap dancing all over traditional format. Just know that you've got, at least: a beginning (the Set-Up through Commitment), a middle (Commitment through the Escalation) and an end (the Final Battle through the Reward).
Scenes
However many you have, Acts are made up of SCENES. Scenes are simple. Every scene begins with someone expressing a desire. When s/he reverses that desire, the scene is over. It doesn't matter how many locations your characters inhabit in the process; once that initial desire reverses, the scene is over. In its simplest form, a scene opens with someone entering a room and ends with that person exiting. In a great script, that exit triggers a chain reaction that forces your main character into an even tougher choice in the next scene.
To risk terrorizing any actors who read this, the phrase "Whose scene is it?" is easy to answer. Whoever reverses at the end of the scene owns it. And your main character should own the majority of the scenes in your script.
Beats/Choices
The Scenes you are going to carefully tweak to make sure someone reverses are made up of little, building moments called BEATS, things your characters do or say to get something they want. If you have ever been in a fight with your lover or your mom, where what you say or do does not yield easy or expected results, you understand beats. You say or do A…and s/he responds with C. That's a beat. In response, you say or do D…and s/he counters with F. Another beat. With each beat, you are shifting your intention further away from your original goal. At one point, you reverse your original intention, and that beat is the end of a scene. Here are sample beats:
· Kramer enters his son Billy's room with a letter from vanished wife and mother Joanna. He tentatively opens the letter with Billy.
· Billy listens excitedly to the letter and asks lots of questions. Kramer confidently reads on, excited for Billy and himself.
· Kramer reads that Joanna has a new home and a new job and isn't coming home. Billy instantly shuts down and stops responding to the letter.
· Kramer puts a happy spin on the news and keeps reading. Billy drowns out the rest of the letter by turning up the TV with his remote control.
· Kramer gives up battling the TV and leaves the room with the unfinished letter.
As you can see, Beats are actually CHOICES. Choices are the building blocks of human behavior. Everything you do is a choice and a statement of what you value and prioritize in that moment. Similarly, everything your main character does is a choice that tells the audience what matters in his or her life right now. By facing tougher choices and making harder decisions, your main character will show your audience and your story analyst how s/he is changing throughout the movie.
Warning! If any characters are faced with an obstacle and make a choice to move past it…they do not get to make that same choice ever again in response to that obstacle! If they do, that is what's called a "repeat beat." As in – they already tried that, it didn't work, why are they trying it again? Your story just lost momentum.
Worse, if the Beats/Choices in your script are entirely routine, without build, intrigue or surprise, your audience and your story analyst will utter the hated words: "That movie was so predictable."
One last tip. The term "beat" actually has two meanings in screenwriting. In story terms, the beat is a building block of a scene. But during the actual scripting phase, you will type the word "beat" to indicate a pause in dialogue for emphasis. Try not to use the second "beat" too often – those pauses are really directing and acting choices!
Now let's take all you've learned and apply it to a simple writing process. Why do I want you to approach your first submission in exactly this way? Because this process is guided by The "1-3-5." And it makes writing the actual screenplay the absolutely last thing you do. It gives you plenty of steps before then to fix things, get notes, tighten story and confirm structure before the blood, sweat and fears that follow "FADE IN."
It is way easier to rework an outline or a treatment than to motivate yourself to rewrite an entire screenplay.
There's one important distinction to make before we begin. If you are writing your script on your own, uncommissioned, it is considered a speculative or "spec" script. The process that follows is both creative- and business-oriented, which is necessary for spec writers.
If you are writing this script for someone else as a "work for hire," your contract will spell out the steps you'll need to take to fulfill the terms of your deal. Still, most of the steps that follow will be part of your process, too, except for the copyrighting and submission.
Whichever one you are, if your completed spine is sitting in front of you, these are the simple steps you must take, in this order, to write your sellable screenplay.
THE "1-3-5" WRITING PROCESS
Step #1: The Original Element
Please don't confuse creating an original element in your script with creating a new format for movies. Listen to me. Your script will sell because of its original content not form!
Consider this. The car is the simplest way for you and me to make the 90-minute rush-hour drive from Los Angeles to Ventura. I don't need you to invent a whole new mode of transportation. I want you to get in my car, which I love, and entertain me on that familiar drive in a completely new and funny and relatable way. I want to see things on that drive I've never noticed before. And when I get to Ventura at last, I will want to go to Ventura with you again. Still in a car. But with you.
But if story structure is so inviolate (for your first submission), where do you get to be original? Remember first that "original" is a relative term. It doesn't mean "it's never been done." "Original" means "it hasn't been done in a movie that the general public knows about."
To close in on "Recommend," you must have either:
· An original type of character to change (beyond biographies, this is the biggest challenge! Still, Boyz in the ‘Hood introduced a young Black man as a naïve new kid on the block rather than a streetwise criminal – and earned John Singleton two Oscar® nods; Children of a Lesser God introduced a beautiful deaf woman as a romantic lead rather than a victim and won Marlee Matlin an Academy Award, etc.)
· An original type of relationship to change (Something New tempted a white collar African-American woman with a blue collar WASP man; I once read a romantic comedy script where two strangers' shadows fell in love, etc.)
· An original setting or situation in which the change occurs (Schindler's List sets its reluctant businessman hero in a genocidal German factory circa 1943; Hotel Rwanda sets its reluctant businessman hero in genocidal Rwandan hotel, circa 1994)
· An original issue driving the change (Movies like Kramer vs. Kramer, Philadelphia and Crash were all the first big studio releases to highlight their respective issues – parental custody for fathers, AIDS discrimination, contemporary racial tensions, etc.) It is not okay or effective to just present the issue! Your main character still needs a real story that the issue impacts.
Take a close look at the spine of your new story or at your finished, unsold screenplay. Can you name recognized films that already feature the same type of character, relationship, setting and issue? This is hard to hear. But your screenplay is not a "Recommend."
Rework your spine to reflect the necessary changes to make at least one of these elements original. Then move on to step number two.
Step #2: The Character Breakdown
Your Character Breakdown summarizes each of your characters' key traits and the individual journeys they go on. You've already built the spine of your main characters' story, including his or her arc ("Reject/Embrace/ Sacrifice" the Unexpected Change). Now you must identify and arc your secondary cast. Your secondary characters must have real journeys of their own; they can't just be there to conveniently interact with your main character!
One important note on characters as you develop your cast. If you must, write down every stereotype you can think of about every group you can think of and keep it in front of you as a reminder of what not to write. If you still find yourself scripting a dumb blonde, a feisty redhead, a nerdy computer geek, a heavily accented Korean deli owner, a Black drug dealer, a Latino lowrider, an Asian kung fu expert, a sassy Black chick, a long-haired pothead – oh, do I need to go on? – just remember this. You never know who the story analyst is who is evaluating your script. Why insult them? Worse, why bore them with the same old hack stereotypes? You must really want that "Pass"!
Now title a separate page for each incredibly original, complex character in your story…and go!
· The Main Opponent. Your main opponent is always the cause of the Unexpected Change. Even if it's a shark, a tornado, etc., they still have to arc. Don't think of them in terms of how they will get in your main character's way. Instead, define what need they are trying to fill that your main character stands in the way of. The main opponent must intensify the fight for this need then ultimately lose.
Just like your main character, your main opponent must arc fully in the script, not just reverse. Their need causes them to:
* Incite the Main Character's Rejection
* Thwart the Main Character's Embrace
* Abandon their own cause due to the Main Character's Sacrifice
The final stage of their arc, the "Abandonment" is at the end of the Climax (they will die at the hands of the main character or at least lose their power and have to give up the battle).
· The Supporting Lead. Next, arc the character who is the primary supporter of your main character's journey (this is often the wise-cracking best friend). Supporting Leads must at least make a full reversal in the course of the movie. Their final switcharoo must be a direct result of your main character's choices. And that switch also must impact your main character's Climax, usually in making them less powerful during the Final Battle.
For example, in Kramer vs. Kramer, Kramer's best friend has learned enough from hanging out with Kramer to work things out with her husband and give her marriage another chance. So Kramer has to face the courtroom battle without his biggest fan and confidante at his side.
Important! Your Supporting Lead can't merely cross paths with your main character. S/he must be an integral part of the main character's journey.
· The Additional Supporting Characters. Keep Additional Characters to an absolute minimum, depending on the setting of your movie. Then outline the arcs of your key Additional Characters as they relate to your main character's journey. Rules to write by:
* Each additional character must have a distinct desire that affects the main character's journey. If multiple Additional Characters have the same goal, consolidate them into one.
* Each additional character must bring out a distinct trait in your main character that helps advance the story. If your main character has the same emotional interaction with different Additional Characters, consolidate those characters into one.
* And, as always, each additional character has to at least reverse desires by the end of the movie. If an Additional Character does not reverse desires, change either the beginning or the end of their arc so that they do.
STEP #3: The Beat Sheet
Great news – you are about to start writing! No, not "FADE IN:". It's time for the Beat Sheet, a simple outline that bullet points every moment in your script. This is brainstorm heaven (or hell), but remember, you have a roadmap: your story's spine is right in front of you. Plus, you know how all of your characters must change. And you know your theme, so you know what issue will be at hand in each of the choices.
As you think up your story, type the beats on a list, write them on index cards, just get the possibilities in front of you. Switch the beats around if you must to make sure your main character keeps making tougher choices and facing tougher obstacles with each new beat. And don't delete or throw away ANY IDEAS you get.
Let's go. Start with your Set-Up…and think of every way possible, that fits into your main character's universe, to provide that opening information…without dialogue.
By not letting your characters talk, you're forcing yourself to think in terms of ACTION. You will have to SHOW your audience and your story analyst what happens, not TELL them. Hey, it's not called "Tell Business"!
The Beat Sheet is the last freestyle phase of writing your screenplay. Experiment!
For example, in The Truman Show, the writer knew the Unexpected Change had to alert Truman that his life was a sham. The writer might have had Truman hear a director yell "Cut!" offstage. That wouldn't have been the best option – it's dialogue-driven, and in movies, you're aiming for action.
Maybe Truman could have seen an extra in a make-up chair. That would have raised his eyebrows, but it's not very funny and it could easily be explained away in Truman's perfect world.
By the time the screenwriter decided to drop a big light out of the sky and clock Truman in the head, the Unexpected Change was announced in an outrageous way, was visual rather than verbal, and was about as big a sign as Truman was going to get. Of course, Truman Rejected the information. It's a movie!
In building your beat sheet, remember how beats work: There's an event. Your main character reacts to it. That reaction triggers a slightly bigger event. That triggers your main character's slightly bigger reaction. See how the trench digs deeper? If your main character's first response to trouble is killing the main opponent…where on earth will you go from there?
Remember that you are writing a movie about your main character's choices. If your main character instead always reacts to other people's choices, s/he is called a "passive protagonist." And you just put the "Pass" into "passive."
After you "beat out" your Set-Up, no dialogue, do the same for the rest of your story, closely following your spine. Remember, a beat sheet's whole driving energy is "And then what happens?"
It is not "What does s/he say?" – it is "What does s/he DO?"
A sample partial beat sheet would look like:
THE SET-UP (spine headings are for clarity, not format)
· Joanna tearfully kisses Billy goodnight.
· Joanna hauls down her suitcase
· Kramer schmoozes with his boss about the latest account
· Kramer's co-worker says goodnight
· Kramer notices the time but settles in for one more story
· Joanna packs frantically
· Kramer's boss announces Kramer's the lead on their big new account
· Joanna anxiously waits for Kramer to come home
· Kramer arrives home
THE UNEXPECTED CHANGE
· Joanna says she's leaving
· Kramer talks over her, announcing his new account
· Joanna presses on with the list of what Kramer must do
· Kramer insults Joanna's disregard for his news
· Joanna lugs her suitcase to the door
· Kramer grabs the suitcase away from Joanna
· Joanna runs out without the suitcase
· Kramer runs after apologizing
· Joanna says she's leaving because she's worthless
· Kramer blocks the elevator door and counters with praise
· Joanna says she's leaving him with Billy and she doesn't love Kramer anymore
· The elevator door closes
THE REJECTION
· Kramer unpacks Joanna's suitcase
· Kramer calls Joanna's best friend and tells her to send Joanna home
etc.
You have three pages for your beat sheet. Shoot for three (no reduction here – you'll need all three!).
STEP #4: The Treatment
The treatment is the full prose narrative of your screenplay. Now you're going to expand the moments from your beat sheet into a narrative account of your script.
Why is the treatment so important in The "1-3-5" writing process? First, it establishes the fully fleshed out story you are trying to tell, a fully formed foundation for your script. Second, when you are hired to write, you almost always will be expected to turn over a treatment and execute notes on the story before you are cleared to write the script. It's a necessary skill to hone. Third, the story is its own independent element in the movie industry. In fact, there are usually two separate payments for a script: the story money and the screenplay money. Even if you sell a completed script, it could be handed over to someone else to completely re-do. In that case, you might only get part of the money and credit for the story.
You've seen many screen credits that read: Story by X; Screenplay by Y? That's because writing a story and writing a script are separate tasks. Even if the same person does both, writing a script is a much simpler thing to do with the foundation of a terrific story.
You have about thirty pages to write your treatment. Shoot for twenty.
A sample treatment would look like:
INT. UPSCALE APARTMENT – NIGHT
JOANNA KRAMER (30s, female) sits tearfully at the bedside of her sleeping son, BILLY (8, male). She strokes his hair; he shifts and murmurs, deep in sleep. Joanna tenderly kisses his cheeks and says she loves him. The sleeping Billy does not respond.
INT.
AD AGENCY – NIGHT
TED KRAMER (30s, male) laughs at another sly wisecrack from his boss and mentor, JOHN (50s, male). John butters Kramer up as a MALE CO-WORKER enters to say he's heading home to his family. Kramer quickly checks his own watch for the time…then settles in for one more round of repartee with John.
etc.
It is critical you get notes on your treatment when you are done! Don't wait until you have hammered out one hundred-plus pages of script and slugged your way through format and dialogue. You will resist notes to a finished screenplay because of all the work you will have to "undo"! Notes to a treatment are far easier to address.
More importantly, if your story does not work…your screenplay will not work and will be torture to try to write. Make sure your story is structurally sound before you begin to write your screenplay. You will save yourself weeks, even months, of hard work.
Don't rely on friends and family for notes on your treatment. You get one layperson; the other feedback absolutely must come from someone working in the filmmaking industry who does not know you or have anything invested in making you feel good about yourself. This often will be your rep, and if not, hire a trained story analyst (Movie in a Box actually offers script analysis and development based on The "1-3-5" System).
Keep revising your treatment until you don't get any more notes that begin with "I didn't understand it when…" Even better, wait until the only professional note you get back is "I cried at the end" – even if it's a scream-out-loud comedy (think of that final snapshot in "Four Weddings and a Funeral" of Hugh Grant and Andie McDowell with their baby).
You might want to copyright your final treatment if you do not feel safe distributing it. See Step #5, "Drafts" if you choose to do this now rather than with the final script.
STEP #5: The Drafts
At last, it's time to type your screenplay! You know what's so great about this moment? You've put so much work into developing your characters and crafting a solid, escalating story…that all you really have to concentrate on now is great dialogue. You don't have to figure out how to develop character, advance story, brainstorm locations and craft witty words all at once.
With your treatment in front of you, type "FADE IN:" and begin translating your story into a script by adding distinct voices and original dialogue for each of your characters. Remember, never let a character say with words what they can show with actions. This isn't TV; it's the movies!
Screenplay Format
Screenwriting software costs less than $100. Get a second job if you must, but buy it. You don't want to worry about format right now; you're supposed to be breathing life into your rich and complex characters!
Also, please end every scene with "CUT TO." Not "SMASH CUT." Not "SOFT DISSOLVE." You aren't editing a movie; you're writing one! Keep it simple.
Dialogue
As you finally start writing, here's what you should discover. Because you've been living inside this story so intensely and understand your characters so clearly, your characters will start talking to you! But put those voices through a quick litmus test before you give them free reign over your fingers:
· Regional accents – don't spell these out; they're too hard to read. It's enough to indicate "strong Bronx accent" when you introduce the character – but only if a strong Bronx accents serves the story! If that accent doesn't fuel an actual incident in the story, lose it. A southerner may surprise you at the casting!
· Stereotypical language – please don't make all of your southern characters say y'all…or your Asian characters mix up their l's and r's…or your African-American characters drown in double negatives…or your kids say "Gee" or "Gosh", or oh, you get it. It's just not original, and your first submission has to be original.
· Exposition – don't ever let your characters say what happened when you can show it. Same goes for voiceover – your audience and your story analyst will think it's lazy writing, unless it's absolutely necessary. And, please, don't ever let your characters say exactly what they mean. Do you know why? Because real people don't ever say exactly what they mean.
When a gorgeous woman walks by, real people don't say "Look at her – she's so much better looking than I am!" They clench their coffee cup, they avoid her friendly gaze, they seethe until she passes. Then they glare at her vanishing figure and say, "Nice shirt. Not." They don't say what they mean ("I am so jealous! I look like nothing next to her!"). But, boy, do you get what they mean.
If your characters say exactly what they mean, your audience and your story analyst will say the hated words, "That dialogue was so ‘on the nose.'" Then your story analyst will type "Pass."
· Sit-com Speak – could your ensemble of wise-cracking characters all sound any more like Chandler and the cast of Friends? You cannot have every character in your screenplay zing witty comebacks and asides throughout the script. Take a moment to listen to real conversations you are engaged in or that are around you. How do different people convey humor, love or sorrow? Make sure your characters' voices are distinguishable from one another!
When your characters have done and said all they are supposed to, according to your solid treatment, type "FADE OUT." And walk away for at least a day. Show it to no one.
The Second Draft
After time off, re-read your first draft with a red pen and a caffeine IV drip. Test the first draft against the checklists at the end of every chapter of this simple little book. Make notes to adjust. Then get on your computer, "Save As" a second draft and start typing again to fix it.
The Copyright
Sorry, but mailing a script to yourself or even registering it at the Writers' Guild doesn't give public the ability to see who owns the work. And that is the purpose of a copyright, to give public notice that you are the creator and/or owner of a work. Thirty bucks and a Form PA, plus a clean copy of the script, sent to the Register of Copyrights at the Library of Congress gets you a registered copyright.
You can download a Form PA and instructions from the "Forms" section of "www.copyright.gov." Most of you will be able to use a simple Form PA, which is a short, one-sided form. Others will use the full Form PA, which is only two sides.
Of course, as soon as you put your script into tangible form, i.e., type it up, it's technically copyrighted. But it's the registration of your copyright that protects you, not the copyright itself!. So add the copyright mark and a date, e.g., "© 2007 Your Name Here" to your cover page, then send your script in to register the official copyright so you can start soliciting feedback with less fear.
If you already copyrighted your treatment, now you will send in a new full Form PA for the screenplay version, indicating that this script is based on an earlier copyrighted item. There is a space on the Form PA where you indicate the name and the copyright number of the original submission.
STEP #6: The Notes Process
Don't resist the notes phase of your writing process! It's not only necessary to get fresh eyes on your script, but the ability to effectively address notes is a crucial part of your professional writing skills.
The Table Read
To get a feel for your story, hear your dialogue – and find typos, grammatical errors and other unacceptable mistakes, bring in real actors and have them read your draft aloud (we are specifically calling it a draft now so you will be open to changing it).
No, you do not have to incorporate your readers' exact fix recommendations into the draft – especially if they violate story structure! But listen closely to see if multiple notes address the same sections or issues in you draft. Because those are areas you will need to fix. Use The "1-3-5" to understand what's really wrong…and how to make it right.
Important! From this moment on, you must remember your new goal. You are no longer trying to write a screenplay. You have already written a screenplay! You now are trying to sell a screenplay. This is not a Ph.D. dissertation you are defending to a group of ungrateful professors. YOU WILL NOT DEFEND ONE WORD OF YOUR "BRILLIANT" SECOND DRAFT TO ANYONE WHO IS KIND ENOUGH TO BOTHER TO READ IT AND PROVIDE FEEDBACK. They are not attacking you; they are granting you the gift of their time and fresh opinion. For free, may I add. So graciously accept every note you can from everyone you can, then pinpoint the consistent areas that people have trouble with. Those are the areas you will use The "1-3-5" to fix in your third draft.
The Test Distribution
Next, get the revised draft out to at least one layperson and two industry insiders (one biz side; one creative). Pay for this if you have to through a company like Movie in a Box. But listen to their notes. LISTEN TO THEIR NOTES. Rely on The "1-3-5" again to address these notes in your fourth draft.
STEP #7: The Final Draft
Your fourth draft might be the final pass of your script.
However, if your notes were extensive on each draft, you will need to do another reading and test distribution! You absolutely must pay everybody or give them real gifts for a second time investment in a one-hundred plus script read. Get a job if you have to, but this is non-negotiable.
You can stop table reading and test distributing your script when the notes you receive are based on personal taste ("Wouldn't it be funnier if…") instead of structural problems ("I don't understand why…," "It didn't make sense when…," etc.). The feedback will be overwhelmingly more positive than negative. And someone will have cried at the end of your script. And that might take twenty drafts.
The sooner you start listening to and addressing people's notes, the faster you will close in on your final draft.
When you have "FADED OUT" your final draft, it's time to do your "Housecleaning." Spell check. Read the script aloud word by word for errors and for flow. Check format.
Then type a clean, simple cover page (no date!). Skip the funny fonts and pictures. Stick with "TITLE" "by YOU" with your "COPYRIGHT NOTICE" and "CONTACT INFO." Make sure there's an e-mail address on there to make it easy to reach you from different time zones!
Don't forget to complete another Form PA to update the copyright.
The Synopsis
Once you've completed your final draft, you have to condense it into a one- to two-page narrative "synopsis" of the central plot and story highlights. No one's going to open by reading your full script! They first will want to see if the basic story grips them.
How do you write a synopsis? Start with all of the beats from your spine (the "5")…and juice the story up from there! Add some of the funniest moments, the heart-racing sequences, the most moving decisions from your script. Keep it succinct and exciting.
When your synopsis is done, you will want to write a brief "logline," a one- or two-sentence that summarizes your script. Return to your theme statement for this! Here are the elements of a solid logline:
· Who is your main character at the beginning of the story?
· What main opponent is s/he fighting against throughout the movie?
· What's ultimately at stake in the battle?
The logline is where you must establish the original element featured in your screenplay – it's the first introduction anyone will have to your script!
Here are some sample loglines. If you think you can make them better, practice on these before you write your own. Then make sure yours says "zing" and "ka-ching":
· A laid back college professor risks his life to crack an ancient religious code to keep zealots from destroying the very foundation of Christianity. (The Da Vinci Code)
· A loner cowboy battles his love for another cowboy to protect his home and his heart. (Brokeback Mountain)
· A miracle-working matchmaker is bested when he finally falls in love – and loses all his smooth moves. (Hitch)
Distribute your logline and synopsis to your team of "reviewers", as well…then ADDRESS THE NOTES in a revised version. (And if you ever get your hands on a copy of a company's coverage of your script, take a moment to compare their logline and synopsis to yours. What did they emphasize, versus your own presentation?)
Once you have a final draft and a compelling logline and synopsis, you are ready to submit your script.
STEP #8: The Submission
You finally have about 113 entertaining pages of original characters, plot and dialogue. Now it's time to shop your script.
Repped Submissions
If possible, get a literary agent (or at least an entertainment lawyer or manager) to submit your script to production companies and studios. Reps have the pull to get you into the reading pile. You might have to do another round of "polishing" for your rep! Do it – notes should be light by now, and you want your rep invested in the sell.
Once your rep has submitted the script, check in every two weeks or so, so they will remember to check on your script. Also, look for news articles or events that support the timeliness of your script to share with your rep.
If the script is a pass, see if you can get a copy of the coverage. Then ADDRESS THE NOTES in another draft.
Un-Repped Submissions
If you can't get an agent, work your contacts (inside and outside the industry) to see who knows someone at a production company or studio. Without an agent, you will be required to sign a release before anyone will read your work. But you have a copyright, remember?
Also investigate screenwriting competitions that send winning scripts to CEs and reps or are judged by them. Be clear what options and rights you are assigning if you win and keep a copy of all rules, regulations and releases.
Finally, do the rounds at professional gatherings and online screenwriting sites to see who might be looking for your type of script or open to receiving unsolicited submissions. At least try to get your script submitted for coverage, so you can get professional feedback. If it's an amazing script, it will be kicked up to a CE. If it's not, it will be returned to you with helpful coverage…and you may not be entered into the deadly database. As always, read the coverage, and ADDRESS THE NOTES.
For more resources for all of the above, be sure to visit the "Links" page at www.movieinabox.com.
There were "Pitfall Alerts" throughout The "1-3-5" story structure process; you also want to be aware of common danger zones in the writing process.
Collaboration
For people who are crazy enough to collaborate on a screenplay…none of the rules change. The only difference is now two or more of you will be arguing over what the theme, arc and spine are and how best to translate those into captivating actions and fresh dialogue. It does not often speed up the process to bring a second point of view and personality into the screenwriting mix! Yes, there are some very successful writing teams out there, but try not to tackle this often tricky situation for your first submission.
When is it a great idea to collaborate on a first submission? When one person is exceptional at storytelling and the other is exceptional at tone and dialogue. Split the project 50/50 and give each other the space to do what each of you does best.
When it's time to copyright the work, Form PA has space for multiple authors and a description of what each contributed to the work.
One final thought. Do not ever post a listing in the want ads or an online site saying you have a "great idea" and just need a screenwriter to "execute it" for some nominal fee or fifty percent of the sale. You should know now that a "great idea" isn't even a small portion of "executing" a sellable screenplay. If you have a "great idea" and no ability to execute it yourself, then, sadly, you bring nothing to the screenwriting table. You are not a "writing partner" unless you are writing the story or the script.
So either hire a writer to craft a structurally sound story and script (congrats, you are now a producer)…or take on the challenge of The "1-3-5" yourself, and see what you can do. You may surprise yourself.
If you are a writer, do not respond to such listings without making your stance as the owner of the work clear. If someone cannot pay you, it's fine to write "on spec," with the clarification that you retain all rights to what you've written. But there is no reason ever to sign a "Work for Hire" agreement for free! "Work for Hire" means someone else owns what you wrote. Don't even agree to "Work for Hire" for a fee without hiring an experienced industry attorney to review and negotiate the terms. If you are not being offered enough money to more than pay for that attorney… you are being low-balled. Run! If you are not sure what kind of money to even compare your offer to, check the Writers Guild of America's "Schedule of Minimums."
Regardless of the circumstances, before you begin writing anything with or for anyone, please define everyone's exact commitment and responsibilities – including the number of rewrites! – in a written contract. And, of course, copyright your work when you are done. If a sale ever is made, part of that deal will be to transfer your copyright to the new owner of the work (e.g., the studio that distributes it).
Attachments
Don't have any.
An attachment is a person or entity contractually bound to the sale of your screenplay. For a first submission, unless one of the current top five movie stars or directors in the world wants to do your script, any other attachment might cost you a deal if the buyer doesn't love them (or even know them!) as much as you do. Remember, the entities who buy
scripts often have their own relationships with talent they are seeking projects for.
Of course, if one of the current top five movie stars or directors in the world really wants to do your script…they probably have their own production company or deal and will buy it themselves.
Concessions
Sometimes before a company offers to buy your screenplay, they will ask you to make major changes to your script. These almost always have to do with that company's marketing vision…or that company's relationships with talent they want to attach to your script. There is no simple answer for this.
If you have just written Three Kings and after the sale your Black lead is changed into a White one…you might have George Clooney starring in your first and Oscar®-nominated blockbuster studio release. If you have just written Akeelah and the Bee and part of the sale requires that your Black mentor be changed to a white mentor, you might say "no"…and have Lawrence Fishburne starring in your independent studio release. Who's to say which choice is best?
You are the one who must say. This is where you decide if you want to sell a screenplay…or sell your screenplay. Take into account who stands behind your script as it currently exists and what doors might open or close if you change or maintain your current version. Then accept the outcome of whatever choice you ultimately make.
Just know that if you wrote one screenplay that got to a point of final negotiation, if nothing else, your next screenplay is probably going to make it into the weekend pile at that company.
Close Calls
If your submission makes it to a face-to-face meeting, then to more meetings, even to notes and a contract offer…but ultimately the script doesn't sell, your instinct might be to give up on the script and on screenwriting itself. Or you might declare that those people are idiots and continue to shop the script elsewhere.
Both are bad choices.
First, any information on why the script was rejected can only help you in your next submission. If the story wasn't a match for the first company's needs, you can't fix that. But if the script itself had problems, and they will share those with you, you can fix those issues before shopping it to a new place. If they won't talk to you, ask for a copy of your coverage. If they say no…well, that's typical. Move on (or commission private coverage to see what can be fixed).
Second, if you made it to meetings but no sale, you are in the database as a "recommend" – use your momentum while you have it! Immediately begin crafting a second script to submit to the same company.
And sorry that the first sale didn't go through.
You did it. You got an offer on your structurally sound, utterly sellable screenplay!
Your first move? Go get some champagne, sparkling cider or Juicy Juice (if you're as young as Hollywood wants you to be). But don't guzzle it just yet! Your next stop is your attorney.
Do not ever do a deal in Hollywood by yourself. Don't e-mail friends or list-servs and ask for a sample deal to save the dime. Don't ask your cousin the divorce attorney to review the contract. Hire an entertainment attorney...who has done contracts for films you have heard of…and eat the cash to pay for a contract negotiation. The money you pay now…is the money you will not lose out on later.
Of course, if this is a first sale, your negotiating power will be pretty much zero. You will probably not even get to do a first rewrite or be paid more than Writers Guild minimum for a fee. But if you know you have the next genre-busting blockbuster on your hands…and your rep is shopping it to multiple buyers to start a bidding war…the right buyer will know it, too. And they will play ball with your attorney.
Either way, you will be in the database at last, a "Recommend/Recommend." It's time to crack open The "1-3-5", start your next screenplay and take that now familiar 90-minute drive to Ventura. But it will be in a much nicer car.
Now go fill up your glass, mug or sippy cup. And congrats.
THE ROAD TO "RECOMMEND"
|
P |
Pledge #5: I crafted a solid spine for my story then developed distinct characters, beat out the story and fleshed out a strong treatment before writing four drafts of my script and dutifully addressing the note-ridden areas. When I submitted my script, I got an option or sale offer, and my attorney is negotiating it as I speak. I will commit to the same process again on my next script. Thanks, "1-3-5." |
Many years ago, when I was a young writer new to Hollywood, I was at a lunch with a Very Big creative executive who had written a Very Big story structure memo that had become the industry standard for writing Very Big epics. This Very Big CE had just finished consulting on a Very Big movie that had grossed Very Big summer box office.
Very Big CE asked our awed table what we thought of that movie. Unfortunately, I had hated it. But when Very Big CE singled me out for my reaction to the film, I decided to tell the truth. I said, "I didn't know what it was about. There wasn't really a middle to it. Nothing happened in the movie."
The whole room shifted into icy silence. But Very Big CE smiled and said, "Exactly. I fought with them every day on the story for that movie. Then at the end, they said, ‘So what? We made a billion dollars!'" (Literally.)
And Very Big CE had replied, "Yeah, but if it had been structurally sound, you would have made three billion."
That's when I fell in love with story structure. That's also when I realized that in Hollywood, no one will ever agree on what makes a hit movie.
Just get your script sold.
As you leap into first submission land for your script, here's a simple look at the real meaning behind some typical feedback and terms you will hear. Remember, if someone who is in a position to buy your script tells you they have their own word or interpretation or definition for something…their way is the right way!
"Kiss-of-Death" Phrases
Here are translations for eight "kiss of death" phrases your audience, story analyst or others might say about your script:
· When is the movie going to start? Your set-up is too long. Get to the Unexpected Change with a quickness. Page 10 is okay; page 3 is better. Edit the top of your script.
· I don't know what that movie was about. Also, "This screenplay lacks focus." You're addressing too many themes in the script. Each major choice in your script right now is driven by a different issue. They all need to be driven by the same one.
· That movie was so predictable. The beats in your script are common choices everyone would make, with no surprises to keep the audience guessing what might happen next. That's a major rewrite.
· Whose movie is it? Different characters are experiencing the different stages of the character arc. The same character must Reject then Embrace then Sacrifice the theme over the course of the script.
· The dialogue was too ‘on the nose.' The characters state exactly what they mean, without nuance, self-protective language, humor, passive-aggressive innuendo or other natural human communication devices. Add nuance.
· That scene didn't really end. No one reversed desires. Either no clear goal was established in the scene or one character initiated a desire and a different character reversed it at the end of the scene. Tweak the top or bottom of the scene.
· The movie didn't really end. Your climax did not take place between your main character and the main opponent in a face-to-face battle, with your main character ultimately making a sacrifice. Rewrite the end of your script.
· Nothing happens in that movie. Your character arc is incomplete. Your main character did not learn something at the end. Good lesson or bad lesson, make them learn something that relates to the theme.
Basic Teams of Terms
Finally, here's a refresher course on some terms you will use regularly in the screenwriting and selling process. This isn't a long (or alphabetical) list of definitions; it's just key terms from this book, grouped by subject.
Characters
Main Character(s): Also called the "Protagonist." The character whose internal change is the driving core of the movie.
Opponents: Also called the "Antagonists." The thoughts, feelings, people or things that get in the way of your main character's mission. The Primary Antagonist, or Main Opponent, is the source of the Unexpected Change in the story and is the final antagonist your Main Character faces off against during the climax.
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Elements of Story Structure
The 1 – Theme: The central issue, value or institution around which your screenplay revolves.
The 3 – Character Arc: How your Main Character changes in relation to the theme over the course of your story.
The Rejection: Also called the Initial Desire, the Resistance of the Call or the Launch of the Journey.
The Embrace: Also called the 180 or the Midpoint.
The Sacrifice: Also called the 270 or the Reversal of the Reversal.
The 5 – Basic Spine: The core stages that form the foundation of your main character's journey.
Set-Up: the opening moments which establish the normal existence and expectations of your main character.
Unexpected Change: Also called the Inciting Incident, the Call or the Monkey Wrench. The single event near the top of the script that upsets your main character's normal life and launches his or her journey.
Reversal: Also called the 180.
Climax: The Final Battle and Sacrifice your main character makes to complete his or her character arc.
Reward: Also called the Pay-Off or the Resolution.
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Writing Process
Beat Sheet: a bullet-pointed outline of your story (approximately 3 pages).
Treatment: the full narrative account of your story (approximately 25 pages).
Table Read: Also called a "reading." A gathering to read a script draft aloud and get feedback.
Synopsis: a one-to-two page narrative of the spine of your story, with highlights that add "sizzle" to the sell.
Coverage: A document generated by "story analysts" or "readers" that summarizes, analyzes and rates your script.
Page One Rewrite: The expression for notes that require an entirely new version of the screenplay to be written.
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Industry Members
Creative Executive: Also called a "CE" or a "suit." The Development Department staffer at a studio or production company who receives and evaluates submissions for final consideration for purchase and production.
Reps: Also called agents, lit(erary) agents, managers, attorneys. The members of your team who submit your scripts, set up meetings and negotiate deals. An agent typically gets 10% of a sale; a manager 15%; an attorney $150+/hour plus expenses (or sometimes 5% of the sale).
Story Analyst: Also called a "reader." The freelance or staff person who first reads and rates any script submitted to a production company, studio, financier or other industry entity that buys screenplays for production.
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The Road to "Recommend"
Pledge #1: I will strictly apply the rules of The "1-3-5" to my screenplay before submitting it to anyone for any reason, regardless of how hard I must work to write or rewrite my script.
Pledge #2: I will commit to a single issue, or theme, for my main character to confront. All of his or her choices will revolve around that theme.
Pledge #3: My main character and only my main character will arc from rejecting to embracing to sacrificing in relation to my script's single theme over the course of the script.
Pledge #4: My basic spine will set up a flawed, relatable main character, expose them to a difficult Unexpected Change, shift them from rejecting to embracing that Change, jeopardize the Change by pitting them against the main opponent, force them to sacrifice the Change to grow and for the good of others, then justly reward them for that Sacrifice.
Pledge #5: After my first option or sale, despite all the buzz around me and never wanting to work that hard again, I will fully commit to The "1-3-5" system on my next script.
Now we open the vault! As promised, here is an example of the production company coverage that is generated once a script makes it into "the pile." Remember, it's a story analyst's job to prepare a CE for detailed meetings about this script and to protect the CE from reading a script that is not production-worthy. Can your script pass this test?
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"VERY BIG PRODUCTION COMPANY"
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MATERIAL: screenplay, book, etc. |
TITLE: title |
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NUMBER OF PAGES: ## |
AUTHOR: author's name |
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PUB/DATE: for books |
GENRE: drama, comedy, etc. |
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SUBMITTED BY: rep, if any |
CIRCA: time period |
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SUBMITTED TO: CE's name |
LOCATION: city or setting |
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ANALYST: reader's name |
ELEMENTS: attachments |
LOG LINE: A young boy is shuttled via Amtrak between his two separating parents.
COMMENT SUMMARY: A passive protagonist with no focused objective wades through a piecemeal approach to the same old situation: Neglected Child of Divorce.
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EXCELLENT |
GOOD |
FAIR |
POOR |
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Idea |
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X |
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Story Line |
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X |
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Structure |
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X |
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Characters |
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X |
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Dialogue |
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X |
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Budget: High X Medium Low
PROJECT RECOMMENDATION: PASS
WRITER RECOMMENDATION: PASS
SYNOPSIS
When 13-year-old geek ROBBIE FRENCH's parents separate, he's dragged off to Newport with his weak-willed dad MARTIN FRENCH. In the course of being shuttled by train between his dad and his mom (ABBY FRENCH), Robbie has only a pissed off kitty and some comic books for company until he meets another bad parenting-product, 14-year-old MARK HERBERT. After an inexplicable brawl through the aisles of the train, the two boys become friends. Meanwhile Robbie's loser dad loses job after job and his libidinal mom hops from guy to guy.
Robbie parents his dad, feels like an outcast in his neighborhood and silently resents his mom's boyfriends. He even gets a tattoo, only to discover the shady biker tattoo artist couldn't spell – but no one notices the tattoo. When his dad loses yet another job and can't make rent, Robbie toys with designing his own comic book to earn some money. In the midst of one of their shared train rides, Robbie and Mark carjack a cab from a stringy-haired pothead, and Robbie crashes a major comic book company to pitch his first story. He's booted out of the publishing offices, only to be stuck in the middle of an unfamiliar city when Mark is hauled away for the carjacking.
When Robbie's newly divorced mom chooses to stay on her second honeymoon rather than rescue her son, his dad cancels his own pity party to save Robbie, finally accepting responsibility for his child. The two start to take the train back together, leaving Mark unaccounted for, until they both realize neither has the money for a return ticket. Now they both are stranded in an unfamiliar city, but at least they are together.
COMMENTS
When faced with a "child-of-divorce" piece, the first instinct is to search for a new twist. This script, however, offers nothing beyond the most basic beats: parental selfishness and neglect, child-as-misfit in new environment, child resenting parent's new loves, child becoming parent. The main weakness, therefore, is its lack theme, inspiration and originality. Moreover, it fails to tell a coherent story, however unoriginal, in the course of too many (140!) pages.
This script doesn't know what it wants to be. Is it the story of a youngster who finds identity and escape through comic book art? No. Robbie's comic book obsession is just a geeky quirk to justify his having no friends, that becomes a niggle halfway through the script, is dropped, then becomes a full-blown mission at the end of the story. It should have been established as the mission at the top of the screenplay if it's going to be utilized in the climax.
Unless, of course, this is a coming-of-age story. The script does include Robbie's first fight, first train ride, etc. But he doesn't change or mature in the course of any of the script's events, so that negates that possibility.
All of Robbie's scenes with his father are the role reversing beat of son-as-father. All the scenes of Robbie and his mother are the beat of a fun-loving-but-inept mom who can't choose between being a lover or a parent. At the end, the dad does grow up, and the mom does choose (badly), but Robbie, the main character, remains the same. So what you ultimately get is a series of snippets glued together by train trips and a lot of talking.
Structure, of course, is a lost cause without story. Still, there's no detectable initial change – even if you cheat and go to the end to see what the story was driving towards. Robbie doesn't start out wanting to create comic books, so the meeting at the publishing company isn't a climax. Robbie's parents are already separated when we begin. And the character who "turns" at the end of the script is his dad--who has held one pitiful, job-losing, repeating beat throughout the script until this moment. But he is sacrificing nothing (he has nothing), so it means nothing. With neither a beginning nor an end for the protagonist, the middle of the script has no meaning either. Robbie isn't fully embracing or rejecting anything because there is no issue driving Robbie to do anything in the first place.
Robbie is not just stagnant; he is completely unbelievable in his actions. On his first train trip, Robbie's fear of leaving home alone is compounded by fear of the foo-foo cat trying to kill him through the gate of his gazillion-dollar carrying case. Robbie never moves, fights back or complains or even mentions this trauma to his mom when he arrives, nor does the incident trigger any future events in the story. In fact, none of Robbie's actions have consequences – he tattoos his foot with a typo, but no one notices, and the tattoo never comes up again. He tells off his mother's boyfriends but doesn't get in trouble, and he resolves every frustration with his dad by getting on a train to return to his mom, despite her neglectful parenting.
At home, Robbie consistently takes care of his loser dad and never gets fed up or rebels. The few choices he finally makes – carjacking a cab? – hardly connect him to the audience or demonstrate any signs of growth or change. Between his inexplicable actions and the unrealistic way his parents deal with him (bedtime stories and boogeyman checks for a 13-year-old?), he is impossible to relate to or root for. Meanwhile, his father messes up in job after job without ever growing or worsening from the experiences. He clings to his ex-wife in e-mail after e-mail, never giving up or becoming angry enough at her indifference to actually try something new. Most incredibly, neither Robbie nor his dad hold his mother accountable for leaving Robbie alone in a strange city at midnight – the one time rejection and a raging tantrum would have been appropriate. In fact, that was the one last shot at a climax the script had…and nothing happened. Instead, there were just two idiots in the train station instead of one.
The dialogue is as flat as the characters and is written too on-the-nose. Also, at one point the author switches into voice-over mode (never to recur) which takes us completely out of the script.
In short, this screenplay offers nothing new: no new story, new twists, new characters, new voices or new revelations. It's not even a funny or moving journey through an old story. It's a story that needs not be told – and, in fact, isn't.
******
At this point, it is probably clear that neither this script nor this writer is moving forward at this production company – unless it was written by Mega Star's pool guy (or your CE's brother-in-law…or a power agent's favorite client…). In the absence of a connection like that, the writer will not even get detailed notes on why the script was rejected. Instead, the script will be filed away in the company library, and both the screenplay and writer will be databased as a "Pass."
Commit to The "1-3-5" for your first submission to any potential buyer. Then commit to it again for the next.
Happy screenselling!
About the Author
Donna Michelle Anderson, p/k/a "DMA," first developed her "1-3-5 Story Structure Made Simple System" as a story analyst at a major Hollywood production company. Within a year, she was teaching the popular system to students at the prestigious UCLA Extension Writing Program. She since has presented The "1-3-5" to schools, film festivals, industry conferences and private clients across the country.
In 2002, DMA's "1-3-5" system reformed the fragmented world of film schools as the featured screenwriting program for the Movie in a Box one-day filmmaking seminars. The seminars bring hit movie makers such as Miguel Arteta (The Good Girl) and Effie Brown (Real Women Have Curves) off of the set and into the classroom, alongside top industry vendors.
Movie in a Box offers introductory, documentary and advanced filmmaking seminars, company presentations, 1-3-5 script analysis and more, with an emphasis on providing concise but considerable access to film industry insiders and information. More information about Movie in a Box's offerings is available online at www.movieinabox.com.
For over ten years, DMA also has been a successful writer, producer and show runner of dozens of highly rated non-fiction television programs for such networks as CBS, UPN, Fox, Bravo, BET, History Channel, TLC, and more. She now is executive producer of non-fiction production company Tidal Wave TV in Los Angeles. She is an active member of the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences, the Producers Guild of America and Mensans in Entertainment and is a graduate of Stanford University.
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"To the point, simple and right on!" In the Cut and Real Women Have Curves |
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The System |
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Hundreds of books claim they can teach you how to write the perfect script. Listen up: your script doesn't need to be perfect to sell! It does need to include nine standard story elements. Producer, writer and story analyst Donna Michelle Anderson, best known in the industry as "DMA," has been hammering this point home for more than a decade at UCLA Extension Writers Program, film fests, production companies and more, and as the founder and screenwriting instructor of the Movie in a Box one-day filmmaking seminars.
With this concise guide, DMA brings you the simplest steps to unifying a theme, character arc and spine, then streamlining those elements into a sellable script. She calls it "The 1-3-5 System." You're going to call it a miracle. |
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The Shortcuts |
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Get ready for: • a no-nonsense trick to quickly pinpoint your theme • the fail-proof "character arc machine" that instantly focuses your story • one simple rule to speed you through the second half of your script • the eight "kiss-of-death" feedback phrases and what they mean you'd better fix • and more! |
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The Slam Dunks |
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"I love your book! It's brilliant! Your book is SO CLEAR, SO EASY TO FOLLOW!... I'm already RE-WRITING!" —Cassandra S., Writer |
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"One of the clearest explanations of the main tension, midpoint, 3rd act tension concepts ever (including USC film school!)... I smell another rewrite. Damn
you..." |
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"1-3-5. What a revelation." —Robert A., Writer |
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For more info visit: www.movieinabox.com |
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